“Once your mindset changes, everything on the outside will begin to change along with it”

-Steve Maraboli

The mind is a powerful place. Changing your mindset, this thing that has been engrained in you since you were born, is no easy task. The journey to conquer the mind comes with ups and downs just like any self improvement journey but it is well worth it if you can even get an ounce of control on your unruly mind.

Mindset is loosely defined as the habits of the mind formed by previous experiences. As you go about your life you have tendencies and you develop habits. These are things you may not even be consciously aware of. You develop ways of dealing with things and ways of speaking that are just second nature. The practice of shifting these mindsets takes consistency, persistence,  and self awareness but it absolutely can be done and these are three simple shifts you can start implementing today to get you started.

“I Get To”

The shift from saying “I have to” to “I get to” may seem subtle, but it has a profound impact on our mindset, attitude, and overall mental well-being. This change embodies a perspective shift from viewing tasks, responsibilities, or life events as burdensome obligations to seeing them as opportunities and privileges. Here’s how this change in phrasing can transform our mindset and influence our mental state:

1. Promote Gratitude: When we say “I get to,” we frame our actions as choices and privileges rather than burdens. This fosters a sense of gratitude for the opportunities and abilities we have, whether it’s “I get to go to work”, implying gratitude for employment, or “I get to exercise”, appreciating the ability to move our bodies. Gratitude is linked to increased happiness, reduced depression, and overall better mental health.

2. Increase Motivation: “I have to” can feel like an external imposition, which might resist or resent. In contrast, “I get to” implies a choice, making the task feel more like a personal decision rather than a forced obligation. This can increase intrinsic motivation, making us more likely to approach tasks with enthusiasm and energy.

3. Enhance Perception of Control: Using “I get to” suggests control over our actions, which is empowering. It reminds us that we are in control of our lives, capable of making choices rather than merely responding to demands. This sense of control is crucial for mental resilience and can reduce feelings of stress and helplessness.

4. Shift Focus to Positivity: This shift helps direct our attention to the positive aspects of our responsibilities and the benefits they bring, rather than dwelling on the negatives or the effort involved. This positive focus can improve our mood and reduce the mental drain often associated with tasks viewed as chores or duties.

5. Encourage Mindfulness and Presence: Saying “I get to” can also enhance mindfulness, making us more present and engaged with our current activities. It encourages us to appreciate the moment and the unique opportunities it presents, rather than rushing through tasks with our minds elsewhere.

Things Are Happening For Me, Not To Me

The phrase “things are happening for me, not to me” embodies a powerful shift in perspective from viewing life’s events as adversities inflicted upon oneself to seeing them as opportunities for growth, learning, and empowerment. This mindset encourages individuals to interpret challenges, obstacles, and even failures not as mere setbacks or injustices, but as meaningful experiences designed to foster personal development, resilience, and a deeper understanding of oneself and the world.

The Impacts of This Perspective Shift:

1. Fosters Resilience: By believing that experiences happen for you, you’re more likely to bounce back from difficulties with a stronger sense of purpose and determination. It transforms the narrative from victimhood to heroism in your life story, where every challenge becomes a stepping stone to becoming a more robust and wiser version of yourself.

2. Encourages Growth Mindset: This perspective is closely aligned with the growth mindset, where challenges are seen as opportunities to learn and grow rather than insurmountable barriers. It propels you into a state of continuous learning, where every experience, good or bad, contributes to your personal and professional development.

3. Enhances Problem-Solving Skills: Viewing situations as happening for you encourages a proactive approach to problem-solving. Instead of dwelling on the problem or feeling overwhelmed, you’re more likely to look for solutions, learn new skills, and seek out resources to overcome the challenge.

4. Increases Gratitude and Positivity: When you see life’s events as serving your growth, you naturally feel a sense of gratitude for the opportunities to evolve. This gratitude fosters a positive outlook on life, which has been linked to numerous mental and physical health benefits, including reduced stress and improved wellbeing.

5. Shifts the Focus to Control: This mindset highlights the aspects of your life that you can control—your reactions, your mindset, and your actions—rather than fixating on external circumstances beyond your control. It empowers you to take charge of your life and make changes that align with your values and goals.

No Feeling is Final

“No feeling is final” serves as a powerful reminder of the fleeting nature of emotions. It suggests that no matter how intense or overwhelming an emotion may feel in the moment, it is not permanent. This perspective offers comfort during difficult times and encourages resilience by reminding us that emotions come and go. Embracing this concept can have profound effects on how we navigate our emotions.

1. Enhanced Emotional Resilience: Understanding that “no feeling is final” fosters emotional resilience, it equips us to better withstand psychological stress and recover more quickly from emotional setbacks. By acknowledging that feelings are temporary, we are less likely to be overwhelmed by them and more likely to maintain a balanced perspective in challenging situations. This resilience is crucial for adapting to change and coping with life’s ups and downs.

2. Increased Emotional Agility: Embodying this phrase can lead to greater emotional agility—the ability to navigate complex feelings and react to situations with awareness and flexibility. When we recognize that our current emotional state is not an endpoint, we’re more open to exploring a range of responses rather than reacting impulsively. This agility allows us to make choices that align with our values and goals, even in the face of emotional challenges.

3. Promotes Mindfulness and Presence: The realization that “no feeling is final” encourages a more mindful and present approach to life. It invites us to observe our emotions without attachment, recognizing them as passing states rather than defining characteristics. This mindfulness fosters a deeper connection to the present moment, allowing us to experience life more fully and with greater peace. It reduces the likelihood of getting stuck in negative emotional patterns and promotes a sense of inner calm and acceptance.

Conclusion

It really doesn’t take much to start changing your life today. The key to implementing these mindset shifts and receiving the benefits from them is being consistent and self aware enough to practice them at all times. It takes patience and practice but anybody can change the way they think and the way they approach life.